Do you find yourself posed with the question who am I? How do I discover my Identity? Or have you come to define yourself in light of what life's situation has presented you with? Or is your self worth perceived in light of what you have or don't have? If you find yourself asking one or all of these questions then this write up is for you.
Listening to one of the songs in Tasha Cobb's recently released album "Royalty" really spoke to me and inspired me to come up with this write-up, believing that it would speak to someone too. It was a moment of reaffirming and proclaiming who I am. Proud to be identified with the Father, my Root and my Source, likewise throwing a spade of sand in the eyes of the enemy and confidently proclaiming who I am. Isn't it amazing? "I am Royalty" "Made in Abba's Image..."
Now, what would you do and how would you feel if you knew that your Father or someone very close to you was a celebrity, a king or a public figure? If you are someone like me(winks) I believe that your newly found reality would spur a rapid change in the way you think, talk, and walk. As a matter of fact everything about you would change. You would never allow anyone to talk you down or maltreat you.
In addition, I also believe that you wouldn't wait for people to affirm that you are related to a highly placed personality, instead you'd be the one to bring them to the reality of who you are and whose you belong. As for me I could say something like "Do you know I am a Princess?", "Do you know my brother is the President's P.A?" Do you know that my Father is King?..."(chuckles)
The knowledge of your identity will stir you to do things that exceed your expectations.
WHAT IS IDENTITY?
Identity simply means what an individual has built or structured his life around overtime and thus find relevance and meaning through it. To talk about Identity is to talk about Who you are? What sums up your life? What defines and gives you a sense of value/worth?
We live in a world where we are daily surrounded by different voices of opinion, thereby leaving us with choices to make. Choices that could either make or break us. Different people in different places have come to identify and define themselves according to what feeds them physically, intellectually, spiritually, and emotionally.
We live in a world where we are daily surrounded by different voices of opinion, thereby leaving us with choices to make.
In spite of all the varying options, the term Identity crisis is not a rare word today. And, this gives us an insight into the fact that people still battle with who they think they really are. Still in search of something deeper and tangible.
People tend to battle with identity crises at different stages of life, especially when they lose the things or the people they have had close attachment with overtime. This brings me to answer the question: What is Identity (your identity)? Your identity is the original you in terms of your values, ability, strength and attributes.
Your identity is not found in your weaknesses, neither is your identity found in people, activities or material things. Your identity is the real you regardless of any situation or circumstance you find yourself. It is being sure, stable and confident in who God has designed you to be. The knowledge of your identity will stir you to do things that exceeds your expectations.
3 Factors that Contribute to Identity Crises.
The Israelites; God's very own chosen nation and people, had spent so much time in slavery that they had forgotten who they are. They had experienced so much pain and ridicule to the point that they had lost themselves in the identity of their slave masters. God had to have them go through a 40year journey in order to restore their identity, and bring them to the consciousness of who they truly are, whose they belong and how they can confidently walk in this reality.
For me, I had so much to battle with as regards my identity while growing up. I had so much concern about my background, stature, colour and as a result lost my self esteem, confidence, courage... I was handicapped, and I couldn't do the things I know I could.
Whenever someone said something negative about me, I would sometimes cry a lot and question everything or get angry at myself and the person. Oftentimes, I would go back and begin to replay and brood over that particular statement in my mind till I find myself adjusting and believing what was said, but thank God today I am free! And now I have the weapon to fight the enemy.
Toxic Relationships
As the social animal that human beings are, having relationship with people is inevitable. Right now, I do not just mean a romantic relationship but all kinds of relationship that cut across all spheres of life: relationship with friends, families, co-workers etcetera.
Yet, many a times people tend to entangle themselves in a relationship that affects their mental health, alter their positive perception of themselves and life in general. Clinging to this type of toxic relationships has the power to make an individual lost in the identity of who they are not and start to define themselves by what the relationship holds. Relationships like this would normally transcend into low self-esteem, low self worth and value if not dealt with as soon as possible.
Dysfunctional Upbringing
Developmental psychologist Erik Erikson coined the term ‘identity crisis’. He theorised that, the environment a child grew up in is crucial to forming their sense of self awareness and self.
With this in mind, if a child is groomed in an unhealthy environment where the child is constantly fed with abusive words, having abusive parents, being abused sexually or bullied. Such child will likely struggle with identity crises through his/her adult life if left unattended. It could also contribute to other major crisis for the child and those around him. For this reason, I would like to say; "Build a healthy environment for your child to grow in".
Loss of Valuable Possession
At some point in our lives, we are prone to getting attached to things(material possessions) or the people we've unconsciously built our self worth and value around. Upon losing any of these things that we tag or see as valuable, questions arise, and confidence in oneself could start to waver. For some people depression could set in. Being grounded in the knowledge of who you truly will help you to remain undaunted no matter what life throws at you.
How to Discover your Identity?
Today, there are lots of people who are lost in the identity of who they are not, overwhelmed by the voices of what people say about them, and who they perceive themselves to be as a result of pain and hurt from relationships, background... How sad, oh how sad it is for slaves to ride on horseback and Princes walk as servants(Eccl 10:7). It is vital to be able to stand firmly in the knowledge of your true amid life's challenges. To find your Identity you have to:
Find Christ
Your Identity is the original design God created you to function in and this identity can only be found in Christ Jesus. There's nothing as identity crises when you are in Christ Jesus.
It is a season of revival of Identity and God is calling for us to come out of who we are not in order to be all He has called us to be. The revelation of who we truly are in Christ sets us free from the bondage of the enemy,..."influences our decision, guides our response and prompts our action" -Manuel King.
Remember to be who you really are, you have to find Christ first, spend time with Him and He will in turn help you to see everything He sees in you. Interestingly, this is how God sees you according to:
1 Peter 2:9NLT "But you are not like that, for you are a chosen people, You are royal priests, a holy nation, God’s very own possession. As a result, you can show others the goodness of God, for he called you out of the darkness into his wonderful light."
Be Self Aware
To be self aware is to have an unbiased intimate understanding of oneself in order to live a better and quality life. To be self aware is to pay attention to your strengths and weaknesses and then choose to double down on your strengths while eliminating or paying less attention to your weaknesses. Being self aware means, understanding what drives your actions and reactions, values, personality, emotions etcetera
A successful life is not built by focusing on one's weaknesses rather a successful life is built on focusing on one's strength. However, knowing your weaknesses simply means identifying and dealing with the things that limit you as you build a more meaningful and concrete life.
No wonder the Apostle mentioned that "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me."-Philippians 4:13 NKJV Here the Apostle Paul decides to minimize his weaknesses while drawing strength from the understanding of who he is in Christ Jesus.
Thank you so much, for this writeup